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Relationships bewteen locals and foreigners?This forum post has messages dated from 02/13/12 through 02/16/12, please be sure to read all the messages. If you feel it is old or outdated, please follow up with a question or comment and someone may be able to update it, or reply with newer information if you have it.
| Relationships bewteen locals and foreigners? I'd like to hear from some of the long-timers in Uruguay about their experiences with the local people (friendships, working relationships, dating). Are Uruguayans accepting of foreigners? Is there a lot of envy or jealousy (i.e. "foreigners are rich, screw you") that you run into in many other countries? Leaving aside the issue of language barriers, is it difficult to date? Just to be clear, by dating I do not mean sleeping around, but finding and staying with one woman. I've been to many countries in Asia, so I'm very familiar with the attitudes one encounters here ("rip off the white guy at every opportunity"), as well as obviously being a foreigner at first glance (since everyone else is Asian). In Uruguay, though, where most people are of European descent, the majority of people are white, right? So I'm guessing that just walking down the street it wouldn't be totally obvious one is not Uruguayan? In Asia, many people are extremely shy when meeting a foreigner (especially non-Asian), and I've had woman literally back away from me as if I was going to bite them when simply asking a question in their native language. I'm guessing there won't be that same level of "Oh my god, he's so different from me! He has a 'big' nose and hairy arms!" in Uruguay as in Asia. But, are you still treated as being very different from the locals? |
Comment #102/14/12 07:13Rural east Colonia departmento | "Friendly but reserved"
When it comes to the population, I'd reckon that the ROU's is more European that in any European country I have visited. OTOH, they are mostly reserved about inviting strangers (foreign or not) into their homes as a Uruguayan home is a very private place. I'm elderly and when I first arrived here on my own, spent 6 months looking, bought myself a farm and started building myself an oversized home, I used to get numbers of small gifts from divorced women of a certain age as well as assorted invites. I'm old, wrinkly and overweight but I reckon that my apparent wealth and my EU passport made me seem like an attractive option. However, when my English SO arrived, the presents and invites stopped. :-) You might find that the clothes you wear and your general attitudes will identify you as a foreigner when you first arrive but IME these things soon pass. I've yet to meet any anti foreigner sentiment. I'm a farmer and over time I've discovered that many of my farming neighbours are foreigners too even though they've been here since the 1940s. They look and sound like Uruguayos but insist that they are really Italian or Swiss :-) The ROU is a nation of immigrants. |
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| "Friendships need a basis..."
just making a sign that reads "Poor, self-pitying, hard to understand foreigner seeks friends immediately, " putting the sign around your neck and going to the mall to hang out will bring almost identical results in MontecideoShopping as it would in any U.S, mall, derision and avoidance. When I moved to Buenonos Aires 9 years ago Argentine friends introduced em to Argentine friends. A year later I was in a convention in Montevideo when an Argentinefriend introduced me to the Uruguayan who became my wife.How did all this happen? We were all memberws of the same fellowship. I also made other friends in BsAs in the Toastmasters' Club. When my wife and I (very soon to be ex-wife)opened Feligeta, a short-lived Art Gallery Café, we made other friends. I lived here 7 years (including the Bs As time) before attending any expat function. So I lived, loved and worked in Spanish. Of course, when I got here the crisis was at its depth so folks didn't have cash to go out anywhere. Thus, I was almost immediately invited into people's homes. Still, today, the same principle holds true; to have friends you need something in common. Expert Page: Enjoy life a bit at Feligreta |
| "Thanks"
@Patrick - Thanks for sharing your experiences. A lot of Westerners retire in Asia, and if you're in the right place (like Thailand), it's normal to have women 1/3 your age making offers. That kind of relationship usually doesn't end well. I'm certainly not interested in being someone's ticket to the States.@ken - I think sitting around looking miserable is a sure fire way in any country of getting people to avoid you. I've met peoples through joining running groups, surfing clubs, and online, but most of those people are foreigners. Not being very familiar with Chinese culture, it's probably difficult to understand why I ask the questions I do. Most Asian cultures are extremely homogeneous, and so just looking different (white, "tall" nose, hairy legs and arms, facial hair) is already too much for some people to handle. If you add culture on top of that, like Asian women being obsessed with having white skin and so refusing to spend anytime in the sun (so no outdoor activities), hating even the slightest indication of muscle (so no sports or physical activities), not being able to swim (so no water sports, which they wouldn't do even if they could swim because of not wanting a sun tan), no dancing or drinking (since most Chinese /Taiwanese women don't drink or go to clubs) you very quickly start running out of common interests. I was assuming that women and men in Uruguay engage in sports and outdoor activities, but wasn't sure what the attitude towards foreigners was. So if you go to the right places, have common interests and a common language it's possible to date? I'm 36 years old. Would I be able to find single women in their 30s? Or are most people married by 30? |
| "a couple of posts...."
Ken and Dyunbao I deleted your most recent posts because they had a few words that will trigger problems with the sponsors here and also in the search engines for people looking for "certain things in Uruguay...."Expert Page: Quick Tips for Getting Settled in Uruguay |
| "Sorry"
Oops, sorry about that! I'll try to be more careful in the future. |
| "Not so bad...."
Just that somethings online work based on 'keywords' without any respect to context.Anyway, I think it is safe to say your looking for a solid relationship and Ken suggested that people who want to spend a few bucks for a non-relationship won't have any trouble either. Expert Page: Quick Tips for Getting Settled in Uruguay |
Comment #902/15/12 07:59Rural east Colonia departmento | "In-laws"
"A lot of Westerners retire in Asia, and if you're in the right place (like Thailand), it's normal to have women 1/3 your age making offers."Yes indeed. I had a business at Phu Kradung in Loei Province for many years. The only similarity you might find here in the ROU is that in both localities, you don't just marry your beloved... you marry the family as well :-) |
| "What I really wanted to say..."
is that Uruguay has a very open attitude toward human personal relationships, and that this acceptance of personal choices is rooted in criminal as well as civil law. I also wanted to assure dayunbo that the ROU is, in my opinion, the least church-ridden of the American republics, bar none.Expert Page: Enjoy life a bit at Feligreta |
Comment #1202/16/12 08:01Rural east Colonia departmento | "Secular state"
The secular nature of the Uruguayan state and freedom from military influence for the last two and a bit decades were two of the factors which attracted me here in the first place. |
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